Symptoms of Garden Lunacy

• You don’t covet your neighbor’s spouse; you covet your neighbor’s plants.

• You go to a garden center to spend $5 for things you don’t need, but end up spending $305 for things you don’t need.

• You spend more money on your garden than your clothes, and you look it!

• You think non-gardeners are odd enough to merit their own taxonomic classification.

• You think “blues” refer to a type of ribbon, not a type of song.

• You refuse to go on vacation during planting season.

• You think deer crossing signs are notices of opportunity, not hazard.

• You invite total strangers to see your backyard, but not your relatives.

• You think the scent of cow manure is better than the scent of Este Lauder.

• You no longer own house and garden plants; they own you.

And, many more in Garden Lunacy: A Growing Concern.   
Copyright ©2003 by Art Wolk. All rights reserved.

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